jims Interviews: May 2008

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Anyone out there?

Anyone out there? Thoughts?,ideas?,comments?

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Thursday, May 8, 2008

On a December morning, a man in a Dunbar Armored uniform told employees at a Bank of America branch in Ellicott City that he had come for a routine pickup. An employee handed him two bags containing nearly $200,000, and he left.

What the bank workers didn't know was that the man didn't work for the security company.
some vids;

Police say the cash was picked up by Robert Allen Flanagan, 38, a former Dunbar employee who kept his uniform after losing his job. The Pennsylvania man made the rounds last fall at several businesses, picking up hundreds of thousands of dollars along the way, authorities allege.

The recent thefts in Howard and Baltimore counties pale in comparison with the robbery of a Dunbar depot in Los Angles in 1997, where an employee masterminded a plot that netted $18.9 million. But police say the local crimes - involving the theft of more than $270,000, the bulk of it stolen after the first of Flanagan's two arrests - stand out for their audacity.

"This was an unusual case and certainly a brazen one," said Sherry Llewellyn, a spokeswoman for the Howard County Police Department. "While bank robberies occur from time to time in the county, this type of case is not something our detectives typically see."

Flanagan's trial in the Baltimore County incidents is scheduled for today in Towson. A trial in Howard County is set for June 17. In the two jurisdictions combined, Flanagan has been charged with two counts of theft of $500 or more, four counts of attempted theft of $500 or more and one count of theft under $500. If convicted on all charges, he could be sentenced to 90 years in prison and be fined $150,000.

Although the suspect had a handgun in some instances, he never used it to threaten employees, who often readily handed over the money because they recognized him.

"I don't hear about this very often," said Bill Toohey, a spokesman for the Baltimore County Police Department. "One of the things that makes [someone] a robber is he has to strike fear in his victims, and since he didn't threaten anybody, it's not a robbery."

Flanagan's wife is scheduled for a trial in June in York County, Pa., on charges of receiving stolen property. According to court records, Robin Gastley Flanagan bought a Chrysler Crossfire the day her husband allegedly took the cash from the Ellicott City bank.

According to court records, Robert Flanagan is a former Dunbar employee who was terminated. A call to the company's headquarters in Hunt Valley was not returned.

The crimes Flanagan is charged with took place on two days separated by almost two months. About 11 a.m. Oct. 15, the manager of Dunbar's Timonium branch took a call from the Build-a-Bear store in Towson Town Center. Employees said a Dunbar employee had arrived to pick up deposits, but they didn't turn over the money because he didn't have his Dunbar identification card.

A store employee described the man as "the ex-Baltimore City officer that used to come here." Flanagan worked as a Baltimore police officer from 1993 to 2005, Toohey said.

Not long after, a man approached an AT&T Wireless phone kiosk in the mall and asked for a bank deposit and logbook. That employee there also noticed that he didn't have an ID card and refused to give him the money, about $800.

About 30 minutes after receiving the call from Build-A-Bear, the Dunbar manager got one from Valley View Farms in Cockeysville. An employee said a man tried to pick up deposits of more than $8,000. They wouldn't give him the money.

But about 11:45 a.m., the Dunbar manager got word that a man in a company uniform went into a Target store on York Road and left with more than $72,000 in deposits, including $55,000 cash.

Police then received a call about 12:30 p.m. from a Kohl's store in Ellicott City. A worker said a man had come to the customer service desk and asked for a deposit worth $21,000. Again, employees refused, this time because they saw no armored car in the parking lot. A woman told police that the orange tote bag that the man was holding made her suspicious.

Most of the day's events were caught on video surveillance, police said. The Dunbar Armored manager saw the footage and said the man resembled Flanagan, according to court records.

Baltimore County police arrested Flanagan the next day at his home. His bail was set at $50,000, which he posted.

In December, a man wearing a Dunbar uniform showed up at the Bank of America branch in Ellicott City. The pickup seemed normal until the bank employee who had turned over the money saw the man climb into a black Jeep Wrangler. He called Dunbar to verify that a pickup was supposed to happen that day.

Officers from York Area Regional Police Department arrested Flanagan at his Dallastown, Pa., home that day, and he was extradited to Howard County. Bail was set at $250,000, which Flanagan has not posted. Calls to his lawyer were not returned.

When police searched Robin Flanagan's purse the day of her husband's arrest, they found signs she had opened a savings account and deposited $10,000 cash, court records show. She also opened a checking account and deposited $177,000 cash, records show. Police found a receipt in the purse for a cashier's check for more than $16,000.

Robin Flanagan, 37, told police that her husband had given her the money in cash and that they had opened the accounts together at a York bank, according to court records. She said her husband told her the money was from a workers' compensation settlement for an accident he'd been involved in, court records show.

The woman knew nothing of her husband's alleged thefts, said her attorney, John Richard Oare.

"She is an injured and innocent spouse," Oare said.

tyeesha.dixon@baltsun.com

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Blogging,Make money with blogging,reviews

Have a product you recently bought and would like to tell the world? Have you had a bad situation happen to you? Been scammed online? Want to just vent?

email:boomandlightshow@yahoo.com and tell us about it we will post it here!
The lists below:
I belong and reviewed alot of these i recommend them all.

Blogging is big business these days, with some bloggers reporting six-figure or even million-dollar incomes. There are a number of ways that these bloggers earn such large paychecks, and the best know how to do it in a way that won't scare off readers. Check out 101 ways that you can earn money from your blog and learn strategies for using these tools and methods in a way that's reader-friendly.

Merchandising

If you're a well-loved blogger, there's a good chance that your readers would like to show their support. Give them what they want and make money by taking advantage of merchandising opportunities.

1. CafePress.com: This perennial favorite makes it easy for you to put your blog's logo on shirts, bags, coasters and other items.
2. Self-Published Books: If your readers like your content, they may want to have something they can own offline or even share with friends. Create a book with self-publishing services like Lulu, and you'll earn profits even without a huge book deal.
3. Printfection.com: Design and sell custom products with Printfection.com.
4. Hard-Copy Content: Create a CD-ROM "book" with cleanly organized content that can be accessed offline. You can take things a step further and sell subscriptions for future updates to the system.
5. GoodStorm: Like CafePress.com and Printfection.com, GoodStorm is a nice way to create and sell your own merchandising products.

Paid Content

Paid content is a good monetization method for bloggers that regularly offer useful information — especially if this information helps others make money. As with all monetization methods, it's all in the approach. Don't create misleading previews of content that requires a membership to read in full. Rather, devote special sections of premium content to readers who are willing to pay for the information.

6. E-Books: Whether it's a compilation of your best tips or a new idea altogether, an e-book is a good, reader-friendly way to package content.
7. White Papers: Like e-books, white papers are a smaller, more technical version of your content.
8. Phone Calls: Sell one-on-one phone calls for advice and other consulting through Ether.
9. Miniguides: If you've just run a particularly helpful series, package it up into a miniguide.
10. Tutorials: Gather your knowledge and compile it into a tutorial that relies upon your expert advice.
11. Members-Only Sections: Whether you're providing access to published items or just ad-free content, make sure you're delivering a product that your readers are willing to pay for.
12. TextMarks Inc.: Charge readers to get text-message alerts about your content through TextMarks.
13. X-Events: Project physical events online and create revenue by charging admission, attracting sponsors and selling subscriptions to future events.
14. Podcasts: Podcasts may be a novelty to your readers, and many of them are probably willing to pay to be able to hear your entries on the go.
15. Videos: Like podcasts, videos are value-added extras that readers may be willing to pay for.

Begging

It never hurts to be straightforward about earning money from your blog. Ask your readers for donations — in a polite way, of course — and the ones that truly value your work will likely be more than willing to help support your ongoing success.

16. PayPal: PayPal's system allows you to place a donation button on your blog.
17. Amazon Honor System: Like PayPal, the Amazon Honor System allows you to accept online donations.
18. Mailed Checks: Of course, good old U.S. mail works just as well. Provide readers with a P.O. box that they can mail donations to.
19. Buy me a beer/coffee: Asking for donations in the form of a beer, coffee or other special item allows readers to reward you with something tangible.
20. Amazon Wish List: Although it's not cash, asking readers to buy you items from your Amazon Wish List will save you from having to buy things yourself. Again, they'll feel more rewarded knowing they've given you something tangible.

Opportunities

Becoming a successful blogger means becoming an expert in your field. You can use this status to earn money through opportunities, while increasing the value you provide to your readers.

21. Writing Gigs: By showcasing your writing talents on your blog, you've provided a living resume to any blog network or news site that might be interested in hiring you.
22. Seminars and Workshops: As an expert, you can invite readers to visit with you in person for seminars and workshops.
23. Bloggers for Hire: Get yourself hired to blog for a corporate Web site.
24. Blogger Jobs: Like Bloggers for Hire, Blogger Jobs can connect you with sites in need of a blogger.
25. Go Offline: Take your blogging skills offline as a columnist in a newspaper or magazine.
26. Guest Blogging: Fill in for fellow bloggers as a guest writer for a nominal fee or just future reciprocation.
27. Job Board: If you're an industry leader, set up a job board that your readers can use to hire or be hired for positions in your field.
28. Create a Radio Station: With a radio station, you can feature podcasts, sell showcase spots to budding artists and even sell audio advertising.
29. Consulting: If you've found success as a blogger, you probably have a lot of knowledge to share about mastering both the Internet and your field. Freelance as a consultant and get paid for sharing what you know.
30. Speaking: Your blog can get your noticed by industry leaders and can land you speaking engagements at conferences and meetings.
31. Book: A number of popular bloggers have landed lucrative book deals.
32. Interviews: Share your knowledge on a new medium and go on radio or TV interviews.

Offline

The benefits, monetary and otherwise, of writing a blog extend well beyond the Internet, particularly if you operate an offline business. Take advantage of these benefits using the following methods.

33. Market Your Services: Your blog is a great forum for marketing your business. Post about current promotions, new interests and other business-building information.
34. Create a Voice Behind Your Business: A blog is a great way to grow your business through personal dialogue. By presenting yourself as a friendly authority, your business becomes more approachable.
35. Deepen Customer Relationships: Beyond providing a friendly voice, a blog can help you connect with customers. Link to their blogs, write about their interests and give them special attention in your writing.

Ads

Ads are generally the bread and butter of bloggers. However, they're also the most likely to irritate readers. To keep a happy balance, focus on relevance and make sure that you're not overloading your blog with too many ads. It should go without saying that you should absolutely not use every single one of these ad programs, either. Rather, pick a handful and rotate them until you find what that works the best for your blog.

36. Yahoo! Publisher Network: Display contextual ads on your site via the Yahoo! Publisher Network.
37. ValueClick Inc.: You'll get quality advertisers, support and advanced technology from ValueClick.
38. Tribal Fusion: Tribal Fusion's impression-based ad service focuses on targeting and optimization.
39. eXelate Targeting eXchange: This program relies on delayed ad cookies.
40. Clicksor Inc.: Clicksor focuses on contextual ads that can be presented in a number of different ways, such as text, graphics and in-line links.
41. Indeed: Post job listings from Indeed and get paid.
42. Chitika eMiniMalls: Promote products through interactive merchandise kiosks and provide both relevant content and comparative shopping to readers. You'll get paid per click.
43. AdSonar: Attract advertisers and build relationships with them individually through this platform.
44. ExpoActive: Get freedom, from specific ads to style, with ExpoActive.
45. AdVolcano LLC: Using AdVolcano's platform, you can design your ads, set your own prices and screen your advertisers.
46. eXelate Targeted Links: Pick and choose the advertisers you want on your site with this program.
47. grokAds.com: Set your price and choose which advertisers to accept with grokAds.com.
48. Adify: Get editorial control and high-value advertising on your site with Adify. You can even set your own prices.
49. AdBriteInc.: Using AdBrite, you have the option to approve and reject ads that will appear on your blog, and you can even use it to sell directly to your own users.
50. BidVertiser.com: These ads are highly customizable, and you have the option to block any ad you don't want displayed on your blog.
51. Blogads: Get invited to this exclusive network of bloggers, and you'll have high-quality, relevant advertising on your blog.
52. Casale Media Inc.: Get high-quality advertisers and control with Casale Media.
53. DoubleClick Inc.: DoubleClick offers differentiation and lots of solutions for publishers.
54. BlueLithium: Get great ad targeting, selective partnerships and better ad performance with BlueLithium.

RSS Ads

A more specialized advertising method, RSS ads give bloggers a way to monetize feeds. Most readers generally react to RSS ads the same way they do with regular ones, so if you stay relevant and limited, it should work out just fine.

55. Pheedo Inc.: This RSS advertising platform offers interactive triggers and video options.
56. Feedvertising: A part of Text Link Ads, Feedvertising embeds ads in your RSS feed.
57. CrispAds: This blog-focused ad network allows you to place ads directly into entries so they'll show up both on your site and in feeds.
58. FeedBurner Inc.: FeedBurner's ads are embedded in RSS feeds,and feature high-quality advertisers like Discover Band, Best Buy and Comcast.
59. FeedM8: FeedM8's service makes your blog ready for mobile content and embeds mobile-appropriate advertising.

Text Ads

Text ads are one of the the most reader-friendly type of ads you can serve. Their small size and text-based nature makes them less offensive and in-your-face than graphic ads. Try out these services to put this type of subtle ad on your blog.

60. Vibrant Media: Vibrant Media's ads are in-text and completely user driven.
61. Google AdSense: Ads from Google are the most popular and often the most profitable source of income for many bloggers. They're relevant to your content, and many blog readers expect it, so you're not likely to run into lots of negative feedback.
62. LinkAds: These text ads come with lots of control.
63. PaidTextLinks.com: Sell links on your site and retain editorial control over what's posted with this service.
64. One Monkey Inc.: You can host highly targeted, text-based ads and earn a great percentage of revenue with One Monkey.
65. Kontera ContentLink: ContentLink turns relevant keywords within your content into a hyperlink ad.
66. Text Link Ads: Text Link Ads' simple, nonintrusive ads are a good choice for many bloggers.
67. TAGword: Select your ads and set your prices with TAGword.
68. LinkAdage Auctions: Sell text links through private online auctions with LinkAdage.
69. LinkWords: LinkWords offers pay-per-click revenue embedded in your content, highlighting keywords that are relevant for advertisers.
70. Textlinkbrokers.com: Get unobtrusive, small link ads, as well as a steady monthly payout that doesn't depend on traffic from Textlinkbrokers.com.

Sell Your Own Ads

Self-advertising is a method that trumps all others in terms of reader friendliness. By selling your own ads, you'll get complete control and will be able to determine the method of ad serving that your readers respond to the best.

71. Individual Advertisers: Your advertisers should be ones that your readers will genuinely be interested in. Solicit ads from major, respected players in your industry for the best results.
72. Actively Sell Individual Advertising: To attract advertisers, let it be known that you're looking for them. Put links on your site, contact potential advertisers directly and post on industry message boards.
73. Create a Media Kit: Make it easy for advertisers to buy from you. Create a kit that includes your rates, ad policies, demographics, traffic, testimonials and contact information.
74. Offer Free Ads: To get things started, seek out competitive companies in your niche and give them free ads for a specific amount of time. This will get other companies interested in advertising with you.

Affiliate Programs

Most bloggers end up dropping product names at one point or another. Whether it's software, books or trinkets, you're probably linking to them for free. Affiliate programs offer a way to profit from your name-dropping, often without changing much more than the URLs you point to. Keep affiliate programs reader-friendly by sharing only products that are truly relevant to your discussion and not going overboard with the quantity.

75. Amazon Associates: Amazon Associates earn up to 10 percent in referral fees for revenue made through blog links.
76. Chitika ShopCloud$: With ShopCloud$, you can list popular products in a tag cloud format.
77. WidgetBucks: These shopping widgets offer popular products, lots of relevance and plenty of customization.
78. LinkShare Corp.: LinkShare's affiliate program will hook you up with programs for companies like Apple Inc., Dell and Disney.
79. zanox: Set up a zanox online shop, choose your products and earn a percentage of every sale.
80. uSuggest LLC: Suggest relevant products to your readers and get paid for doing it.
81. Chitika RPU: If you've discussed a product in a post, make money by putting a link to the product at the end of your text.
82. Auction Ads LLC: Place relevant eBay auction ads on your site to earn money.
83. Recommendations: If you're a fan of a particular product or service, why not ask them directly to pay you for linking to their site?
84. Commission Junction Inc.: You can promote a wide variety of products through Commission Junction, so you'll be able to find something that's relevant to your readers.
85. Chitika Linx: Chitika's Linx identifies keywords in your blog's content and links them to paid product listings.
86. shareasale.com: Sign up with this network and choose which merchants you'd like to promote.
87. ClickBank: Through ClickBank's program, you choose the products you want to promote.
88. iTunes Affiliates: Keep your readers up-to-date on new releases and earn a commission on revenue with the iTunes Affilliates program.

Sponsored Posts

Sponsored posts often rub readers the wrong way, usually because they're blatant cash grabs, but it doesn't have to be that way. Use these methods and programs that allow you to carefully pick and choose what you'll write about. That way, you can stick to products and services that are relevant to your readers and that you truly support.

89. ReviewMe: Pick and choose your ReviewMe posts and earn up to $200 for each.
90. PayPerPost Inc.: Use PayPerPost to earn money from writing about the sites, products and services that you support.
91. Payu2blog.com: Sign up with this program, and you'll get above-average pay, as well as a steady stream of work.
92. Self-Sold Paid Reviews: With paid reviews, the key is to be selective. You shouldn't accept every offer that comes to you, and if you have nothing nice to say about the product or service, don't bother. Be sure to offer an opposing view as well so your readers know that you're not just blindly supporting the highest bidder.
93. SponsoredReviews.com: Review items in your own tone and as critically as you'd like with SponsoredReviews.com.
94. Blogsvertise: When you get an assignment for Blogsvertise, you'll just put three links in a blog entry. This is a great way to make advertising look natural and unobtrusive.
95. Smorty: Choose your subjects and get paid weekly with Smorty.
96. Solicit Book Reviews: Another way to get something from your blog through reviews is to take on books. You'll get them for free while providing a valuable service to your readers.

Other

These are just a few more ways you can monetize your blog in a reader-friendly way.

97. Sell Your Blog: If you've put a bunch of work into your blog and it has great stats, get a lump-sum payday from a buyer.
98. Shareapic.net: Host your photos with this service, and you'll get paid for the number of views they get. That means that you can publish them on your blog and get paid every time someone reads a post with one of your Shareapic.net photos on it.
99. Scoopt Words: Sell your content to mainstream media with Scoopt.
100. Use Your Blog to Create a Mailing List: If you sell products, you can use your blog to generate a mailing list of people who are interested in buying from you.
101. Vizu Corp. Answers: Host polls on your site. Visitors will enjoy sharing their opinion, and you'll earn some extra cash.

Friday, May 2, 2008

ways to annoy people,100 ways to,32 ways to,10ways to,

Ways To Annoy People

Sing the Batman theme incessantly.
Ask people what gender they are.

Practice making fax and modem noises.

Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..."

If you have a glass, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Speak only in a "robot" voice.

Blow your nose when some one is eating.

Start each meal by conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "eat away your food " !

Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.

Name your dog "Dog."

Claim that you must always wear a bicycle helmet as part of your "astronaut training."

Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace."

Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.

Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.

Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors you are a "spider person."

Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room.

Holler random numbers while someone is counting.

Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."

Drum on every available surface.

Staple papers in the middle of the page.

Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.

Set alarms for random times.

Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.

ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.

only type in lowercase.

dont use any punctuation either

Repeat everything someone says, as a question.

Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now."

Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.

Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.

Chew on pens that you've borrowed.

Wear a LOT of cologne.

Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.

Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."

Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture."

Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.

Never make eye contact.

Never break eye contact.

Make appointments for the 31st of September.

Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
100 ways to live forever
1. Grill a steak. You may think it's bad for your heart, but you'd be wrong. Beef contains immunity-boosting selenium as well as homocysteine-lowering B vitamins. And up to 50 percent of the fat is the heart-healthy monounsaturated variety.

2. Watch a scary movie. Anything that causes your heart to race--slasher flicks, a good book, even being in love--also makes your heart stronger, according to researchers at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center. Upsetting the rhythm once in a while is like hitting your heart's reset button, which helps it keep on ticking.

3. Run indoors on hazy days. Researchers in Finland found that exercising outside on hot, hazy days when air pollution is at its worst can cut the supply of oxygen in the blood, making it more likely to clot.

4. Tell your wife to butt out. Or you may leave her -- in a hearse. Researchers in Greece found that individuals who were exposed to cigarette smoke for just 30 minutes three times a week had a 26 percent greater risk of developing heart disease than people who rarely encountered secondhand smoke.

5. Dive in the pool. U.K. researchers found that men who burn just 50 calories a day in strenuous activities like swimming and hiking are 62 percent less likely to die of heart disease than men who burn nearly seven times as many calories -- 340 per day -- during less active pursuits like walking and golfing.

6. Fight cholesterol with fat. A group of 17 Australian men with high cholesterol swapped macadamia nuts for 15 percent of the calories in their diets, and their total cholesterol dropped by between 3 and 5 percent, while their HDL (good) cholesterol rose by nearly 8 percent. The reason: Macadamias are the best natural source of monounsaturated fat.

7. Bike away the blues. Men who are suffering from depression are more than twice as likely to develop heart disease as guys who aren't depressed. So c'mon, get happy. In a trial of 150 men and women, Duke researchers found that after just 3 months of treatment, antidepressants and exercise were equally effective at relieving almost all symptoms of depression.

8. Meditate 20 minutes a day. According to Thomas Jefferson University researchers, this daily downtime may reduce your anxiety and depression by more than 25 percent. And that's important, since a University of Florida study found that patients with coronary artery disease who had the most mental stress were three times more likely to die during the period of the study than those with the least stress.

9. Buy a punching bag. A Harvard study found that men who express their anger have half the risk of heart disease compared with men who internalize it.

10. Take aspirin. Researchers at the University of North Carolina found that regular aspirin consumption cut the risk of coronary heart disease by 28 percent in people who had never had a heart attack or stroke, but were at heightened risk. For maximum impact on your blood pressure, take a low dose just before bed.More Than 100 Ways to Confuse Your Roommate

1. Smoke jimson weed. Do whatever comes naturally.
2. Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at class.
3. Twitch a lot.
4. Pretend to talk while pretending to be asleep.
5. Steal a fish tank. Fill it with beer and dump sardines in it. Talk to them.
6. Become a subgenius.
7. Inject his/her Twinkles with a mixture of Dexatrim and MSG.
8. Learn to levitate. While your roommate is looking away, float up out of your seat. When s/he turns to look, fall back down and grin.
9. Speak in tongues.
10. Move your roommate's personal effects around. Start subtly. Gradually work up to big things, and eventually glue everything s/he owns to the ceiling.
11. Walk and talk backwards.
12. Spend all your money on Jolt Cola. Drink it all. Stack the cans in the middle of your room. Number them.
13. Spend all your money on Transformers. Play with them at night. If your roommate says anything, tell him/her with a straight face, "They're more than meets the eye."
14. Recite entire movie scripts (e.g. "The Road Warrior," "Repo Man," "Casablanca,") almost inaudibly.
15. Kill roaches with a monkey wrench while playing Wagnerian Arias on a kazoo. If your roommate complains, explain that it is for your performance art class (or hit him/her with the wrench).
16. Chain yourself to your roommate's bed. Get him/her to bring you food.
17. Get a computer. Leave it on when you are not using it. Turn it off when you are.
18. Ask your roommate if your family can move in "just for a couple of weeks."
19. Buy as many back issues of Field and Stream as you can. Pretend to masturbate while reading them.
20. Fake a heart attack. When your roommate gets the paramedics to come, pretend nothing happened.
21. Smoke ballpoint pens.
22. Smile. All the time.
23. Collect dog shit in baby food jars. Sort them according to what you think the dog ate.
24. Burn all your waste paper while eying your roommate suspiciously.
25. Hide a bunch of potato chips and Ho Hos in the bottom of a trash can. When you get hungry, root around in the trash. Find the food, and eat it. If your roommate empties the trash before you get hungry, demand that s/he reimburse you.
26. Leave a declaration of war on your roommate's desk. Include a list of grievances.
27. Paste boogers on the windows in occult patterns.
28. Shoot rubber bands at your roommate while his/her back is turned, and then look away quickly.
29. Dye all your underwear lime green.
30. Spill a lot of beer on his/her bed. Swim.
31. Buy three loaves of stale bread. Grow mold in the closet.
32. Hide your underwear and socks in your roommate's closet. Accuse him/her of stealing it.
33. Remove your door. Ship it to your roommate's parents (postage due).
34. Pray to Azazoth or Zoroaster. Sacrifice something nasty.
35. Whenever your roommate walks in, wait one minute and then stand up. Announce that you are going to take a shower. Do so. Keep this up for three weeks.
36. Array thirteen toothbrushes of different colors on your dresser. Refuse to discuss them.
37. Paint your half of the room black. Or paisley.
38. Whenever he/she is about to fall asleep, ask questions that start with "Didja ever wonder why...." Be creative.
39. Shave one eyebrow.
40. Put your mattress underneath your bed. Sleep down under there and pile your dirty clothes on the empty bed frame. If your roommate comments, mutter "Gotta save space," twenty times while twitching violently.
41. Put horseradish in your shoes.
42. Shelve all your books with the spines facing the wall. Complain loudly that you can never find the book that you want.
43. Always flush the toilet three times.
44. Subsist entirely on pickles for a week. Vomit often.
45. Buy a copy of Frankie Yankovic's "Pennsylvania Polka," and play it at least 6 hours a day. If your roommate complains, explain that it's an assignment for your primitive cultures class.
46. Give him/her an allowance.
47. Listen to radio static.
48. Open your window shades before you go to sleep each night. Close them as soon as you wake up.
49. If you get in before your roommate, go to sleep in his/her bed.
50. Put pornos under his/her bed. Whenever someone comes to visit your roommate when they're not home, show them the magazines.
51. Whenever his/her parents call and ask for your roommate, breathe into the phone for 5 seconds then hang up.
52. Create an imaginary cat for a pet. Talk to it every night, act like you're holding it, keep a litter box under your desk. After two weeks, say that your cat is missing. Put up signs in your dorm, blame your roommate.
53. Follow him/her around on weekends.
54. Sit on the floor and talk to the wall.
55. Whenever the phone rings, get up and answer the door.
56. Whenever someone knocks, answer the phone.
57. Whenever your roommate is walking through the room, bump into him/her.
58. Stare at your roommate for five minutes out of every hour. Don't say anything, just stare.
59. Tell your roommate that someone called and said that it was really important but you can't remember who it was.
60. Give each of your walls a different name. Whenever you can't answer a problem, ask each of your walls. Write down their responses, then ask your ceiling for the final answer. Complain to your roommate that you don't trust your ceiling.
61. Take all of your roommate's furniture and build a fort. Guard the fort for an entire weekend.
62. When you walk into your room, turn off your lights. Turn them on when you leave.
63. Print up satanic signs and leave them in your room where he/she can find them.
64. Whenever you're on the phone and he/she walks in, hang up immediately without saying anything and crawl under your desk. Sit there for two minutes than call whoever it was back.
65. Insist on writing the entire lyrics to American Pie on your ceiling above your bed. Sing them every night before you go to bed.
66. Use a bible as Kleenex. Yell at your roommate if they say Jesus or God Damnit.
67. Buy Sea Monkeys and grow them. Name one after your roommate. Announce the next day that that one died. Name another one after your roommate. The next day say that it died. Keep this up until they all die.
68. Collect Chia-Pets.
69. Refuse to communicate in anything but sign language.
70. Eat a bag of marshmallows before you go to bed. The next day, spray three bottles of whip cream all over your floor. Say you got sick.
71. If you know that he/she is in the room, come barging in out of breath. Ask if they saw a fat bald naked Tibetan man run through carrying a hundred dollar bill. Run back out swearing.
72. Leave apple cores on his/her bed.
73. Keep feces in your fridge. Complain that there is never anything to eat.
74. Buy an inflatable doll. Sleep with it.
75. Hang stuffed animals with nooses from your ceiling. Whenever you walk by them mutter, "You shouldn't have done that to me."
76. Lick him/her while they are asleep.
77. Buy Lays potato chips with all your money. Stack the bags in the middle of the room in a pyramid. Eat them whenever your roommate is in the room. For every one you eat, offer your roommate one, each time telling him, "No one can eat just one."
78. Wear no clothes in the room except a cowboy hat.
79. Lay in the middle of the room and chant to pagan gods.
80. Plant grass in the carpet and scream at your roommate every time he/she takes a step in the room. Put up a 'please don't walk on the grass' sign.
81. Give your roommate's clothes to the Salvation Army.
82. Pretend to shower often but only wash your hair in the sink. See how long it takes your roommate to notice.
83. Read lots of science fiction and begin to act as though you think your roommate is an alien in disguise. Jump on him/her and try to rip off the humanoid mask the alien is wearing.
84. Invite a homeless person to live in your room and sleep in your roommate's bed.
85. Set off the smoke alarm in your room and tell the fire department your roommate was smoking.
86. Become your own twin brother and tell your roommate that you and your brother never appear in the same place at once. Tell your roommate the same thing again after leaving and coming back into the room.
87. Sleep face down under your mattress on a bunk bed and stare at your roommate all night through the springs.
88. Wear ammonia as a cologne.
89. Whenever your roommate goes to sleep, wake up.
90. Whenever your roommate wakes up, go to sleep.
91. Have really weird friends who have strange loud conversations. Whenever your roommate walks in, you all be quiet and stare at him/her until he/she leaves.
92. Mount a wall-sized mirror on your wall and then ask your roommate not to look at it because demonic forces from the other side will escape into this world if he/she does.
93. Build an ant farm. Let your ants have "jailbreaks". Then ask your roommate to help you hunt down all the renegade ants.
94. Nail boards across your window. When your roommate asks why, tell him you know they're all watching you.
95. Start a scab collection. Keep it in a locked glass case on your desk. Tell your roommate that you know s/he was looking for the key.
96. Start a neo-Christian cult. Hold nightly candle-lit rituals in your room with your followers.
97. Begin to accumulate a used gum ball. Weigh it every day. Accuse your roommate of stealing gum.
98. Throw blood on your roommate when s/he is wearing a coat and shout "animal killer".
99. Laugh a lot in the morning. Tell your roommate to be happy all the time.
100. Set your alarm clock for three o'clock. Push the doze button every 5 minutes when it beeps for the next five hours, each time telling your roommate that you'll wake up in five minutes.
101. Play Dungeons & Dragons all the time. Tell your roommate to obey you because you are the Dungeon Master. Attack invisible dragons with a cardboard sword.
102. Make a voodoo doll of your roommate. Kill it.
103. Learn the words to all your roommate's favorite songs. Sing along.
104. Learn to play an accordion.
105. Build a snowman out of big balls of toilet paper. Throw water on it and begin to cry that the snowman is melting.
106. Put Vaseline on everything. Tell your roommate that you were just trying to "loosen up" the room.
107. Tell your roommate on a daily basis that he/she is projecting negative karma.
108. Learn a lot of quotations. Whenever you talk to your roommate, say nothing but quotes for three weeks.
109. Adopt an iguana. Collect the skin peelings. Give them to your roommate as a peace offering from Peter (the iguana).
110. Bring several dogs to your room. Hold conversations with them whenever your roommate comes in. If he complains, tell him he is being prejudiced on the basis of your friends' species. Call him/her a bigot.
111. Buy seven different colored yo-yo's. Practice with them seven hours a day, alternating yo-yo's on the hour.
112. Create an animal cemetery in your floor. Hold memorial services. If your roommate complains, tell him/her that s/he has no respect for the dead.
113. When your roommate is typing, type on your keyboard in synchronization.
114. Become a Trekkie. Talk to your communicator. Tell Scottie to beam you up and run quickly from the room. If your roommate asks, tell him "Dammit, Jim, I'm just a doctor!"

ways to annoy people,100 ways to,32 ways to,10ways to,

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